A journey to Costa Rica, Dancing in the Rain, and Rebirth
I returned a week ago from a four-week journey that took me to Costa Rica and Toronto. These past few months, I’ve been navigating an emotionally challenging period, and this trip came from a deep need to create space. It was the first time I allowed myself to leave for so long—a journey I gifted to myself.
I had planned to spend time with a friend living in Pachamama (Nosara), attend ISTA Level 1 in La Fortuna, and end my trip with a short stay in Toronto. My journey had a certain structure, yet I intentionally left plenty of space for the unknown. I approached these four weeks as an intentional "journey," where every experience became an opportunity for growth, awareness, release, and deep transformation.
By giving myself this gift, I stepped into a mindset of abundance and gratitude—gratitude for my past self, who worked hard to afford this trip and made the decision to go, gratitude for my friends and the people I met, for the richness of nature, for all that life offers me, for each precious moment.
Of course, it was easier said than done.
On the very first day, I found myself in intense digestive pain (I have an irritable bowel diagnosis). I started to panic—How am I going to manage four weeks without control over what I eat? I'm exhausted. I miss my friends... And then, a storm broke out. I was trying (and failing) to get work done, rain pouring down on the roof, over the jungle. So I simply decided to step outside and dance in the torrential downpour—to rediscover the simple joy of being naked in the rain, playing under the storm.
When we travel, leaving our problems behind, we sometimes fall into the illusion that everything is resolved—because we’re far from home, from our routines, habits, relationships, and work. We experience a high, a profound shift where we feel like we’ve changed. And then we return home, fall back into our old habits, and the magic disappears.
For me, travel—whether in the physical world or through more spiritual spaces (healing, retreats, psychedelic experiences…)—is like a key that opens a window to the realm of possibilities. In these moments, we access states of consciousness beyond our everyday norm—we feel a unique sense of peace, flow, ecstasy, bliss, contemplation, unconditional love…
These states are no less real than our "normal" state.
By opening that window, we glimpse a possible reality. Now that we've seen it, now that we know it exists—what comes next?
Upon returning to "normal," there are two choices:
Resume life exactly where we left off, slipping back into old patterns.
Walk toward this new reality, integrating it little by little into the "normal."
This path is not without challenges; sometimes, it requires support. But the vision is there—a clear direction to follow. With dedication and effort, step by step, we can shape a new reality that aligns more closely with the altered states we touch during these journeys.
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Since returning from Costa Rica, I continue to fall back in love with my life.
Each morning, I choose to view my daily Montreal life through the lens I cultivated on my journey: gratitude, devotion, abundance, and joy.
Ten years ago, these words meant nothing to me.
A few months ago, with a broken heart, I could no longer feel joy.
Last night, after a weekend full of experiences and connections, I found myself crying spontaneously at the beauty of my existence—my friends, my community, my work, the music playing in the background, the connections that persist across time and space.
🖤🖤🖤
